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Watch this bad parker get what's coming to him

If you're lucky enough to have a nice vehicle, do your fellow gearheads a favor and don't park like a clown. Seriously. Not only will you anger everyone who is trying to find a place to park, but your nice car is a billboard reinforcing the stereotype that car people are self-important and inconsiderate.
Take this gentleman for example. He has a Jaguar XK, and understandably wants to take care of it. Rather than parking it far, far away from any other cars and getting a bit of exercise by walking to his building, he takes up two spots (albeit barely) close to the structure. From the cameraman's narration, we can tell his coworkers are less than thrilled about his inability to stay between the lines.
Naturally, they wanted to teach him a lesson, so they parked a bigger vehicle as close to his driver's door as possible. Mr. XK's attempts to enter his vehicle are rather amusing, culminating in his climbing through the passenger side and scooching over to the driver's seat. While we can debate this sort of treatment all day long, it was effective. The video includes a follow up at the end showing where the XK driver parked the next day, and as you might guess, it wasn't in the same spot.

Dick Van Dyke escapes his flaming Jaguar on the 101

Actor Dick Van Dyke was caught in a dangerous situation on a Los Angeles highway (who are we kidding, every situation on an LA highway is dangerous), when his Jaguar XJ spontaneously caught fire. The 87-year-old actor/comedian pulled to the side and attempted to call emergency services when another motorist pulled him from the car. There seems to be some confusion as to whether Van Dyke was passed out or merely calling emergency services.
According to the photos and video from NBC and The Today Show, the car was thoroughly cooked in the blaze and is now a total loss. After the incident, Van Dyke's wife, Arlene, posted that the actor was "fine," sharing a Vine video of the star, the car, and a few CHP troopers that were on hand. Later in the day, Van Dyke tweeted a photo of his toasted sedan, saying, "Used Jag for sale REAL CHEAP!!"
You can view the Today show segment on the incident as well as Arlene Van Dyke's Vine video, below.

Jaguar ousts Lexus from atop J.D. Power 2013 Sales Satisfaction Index

Jaguar has taken the top spot among luxury brands in the 2013 Sales Satisfaction Index, an annual survey conducted by J.D. Power that measures customer satisfaction with the experience of purchasing a new vehicle. The English brand, not even among the top three luxury automakers on the list last year, vaulted ahead of Lexus, which placed third this year after leading the list in 2011 and 2012. Porsche, meanwhile, moved into second place.
The rankings are based on a point score out of 1,000, with Jaguar earning 740 points, Porsche right behind with 739 and Lexus with 737. Volvo, meanwhile, made the biggest improvement among luxury brands with a 30-point jump to 708, bring it up from 11th place to 9th this year.
J.D. Power has a separate ranking for mass-market brands, and this year Mini again tops the list with a score of 718, far outpacing second-place Buick with a score of 694 and making it the fourth time Mini has lead this list. After Buick, the next two ranked brands are both American and both from General Motors, with Chevrolet and GMC sharing third place with a score of 686.