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Junkyard Gem: 1993 Mercury Topaz GS Sedan

As long as the Mercury brand existed — a period spanning the 1939 through 2011 model years — nearly every Mercury sold in the United States was more or less a redecorated Ford model. The Torino had its Montego sibling, the Crown Victoria had the Grand Marquis, the Cougar was based on everything from the Mustang to the Mondeo, and so on. Naturally, when the folks in Dearborn developed the Ford Tempo compact, a Mercury version had to be created. This was the Topaz, with the official launch of both cars taking place on the deck of the aircraft carrier often referred to as the USS Decrepit. You can't make this stuff up! The Tempo/Topaz, also known as the Tempaz, has largely faded from our collective automotive memory by now, since it broke no significant new engineering or styling ground (this story would be much different if Ford had only put the amazing straight-eight "T-Drive" Tempaz powertrain into production) and didn't have any endearing features other than being a cheap domestic competitor to the Toyota Corolla and Nissan Sentra. Still, close to 3 million Tempazes left North American Ford and Lincoln-Mercury showrooms during the 1984-1994 period. As you'd expect, most of these disposable cars disappeared from both the street and the car graveyard long ago. It takes a very special Tempaz for me to break out my camera while I'm patrolling my local wrecking yards; generally, this means an ultra-rare all-wheel-drive version or at least a very early model in super-clean condition. Today's Junkyard Gem is neither, but I took one look at this spectacular Bordello Red crypto-velour-and-slippery-plastic interior and recognized that this was no ordinary junkyard Mercury. It appears that Mercury had dropped the idea of clever names for base-grade seat fabrics by the time of the Topaz, referring to this stuff as just "cloth" in all the brochures I could find. That's too bad, because Mercurys had cool names for upholstery (e.g., Chromatex) in the old days. The interior is in very good condition but the steering wheel shows substantial wear, so I think this is a high-mile Topaz that got meticulous care from its owner or owners. Ford used five-digit odometers on these cars until the end of production, however, so we'll never know if this reading indicates 65,404 miles or 365,404 miles. The body is very straight, but there's some nasty corrosion behind the right front wheelwell.

This Mercury Cougar Eliminator is a lovely '69 survivor

If you have an overachieving brother/sister/cousin/friend (or whoever), you might know this feeling well; it can be tough to live up to those standards. In many ways, that notion can also describe the Mercury Cougar and its pioneering Ford Mustang sibling. Quite the act to follow, no? Happily though, the Cougar proved to be different enough from its Mustang relative to make a big splash, and perhaps no more so than in its racy "Eliminator" trim, new for 1969. This is one such heady Mercury, dressed in sporty Competition Orange paint, and claimed to be an unrestored "survivor." Need it in your life? The '69 Mercury Cougar Eliminator recently popped up on eBay in Chepachet, Rhode Island . The genesis of the Mercury Cougar began in 1967, really with one singular purpose—to bridge the gap between the Ford Mustang and the Ford Thunderbird with a more upscale, stylish, and chiefly more "European" feeling pony car. It's safe to say the Cougar fit the bill. Using the Mustang chassis as a base, the early Cougars were about three inches longer than their 'Stang cousins and offered better legroom, sleek front and rear fascias, and a more luxe interior. Don't mistake "upscale" for "soft" however; come 1969 the Eliminator package gave the Cougar a seriously mean attitude. Spec-up the interior package and you received high-back bucket seats, a Rallye clock, wood-rimmed steering wheel, and padded interior moldings among other custom trims. Outside is where the Eliminator really struts its stuff, though. Eliminators came equipped with a blacked-out grille, special steel wheels, an aggressive front splitter and rear wing, plus racy decals and side stripes. Four color choices were available — Competition Orange, Bright Blue Metallic, White, and Bright Yellow. As standard, the '69 Mercury Cougar Eliminator came equipped with a 351 cubic inch V8, boasting 290 horsepower, as seen in the case of this car. More powerful options were also available, as noted by Barnfinds, which included a big 390 cubic inch V8 (320 hp), a high-revving Boss 302 V8, and the gargantuan 428 Cobra Jet V8. Peek beneath the body of this Cougar and the 351ci V8 is hooked up to a desirable close-ratio four-speed manual transmission, showing a claimed 35,243 miles. Though the mileage isn't verified, the car's overall condition and wear would suggest the readings to be true. Befitting those low miles, this unrestored Cougar does carry quite the high price — a tall $32,000.

Jill Wagner retired as Mercury spokeswoman

Jill Wagner has officially given up her crown as the queen of Mercury. With the Ford middle child on its way to the scrap heap, Wagner no longer has any automotive hardware to promote. Given her varied talents, we wouldn't be surprised to see her pick up where she left off with another automaker.
And here you thought you'd never be upset about Mercury's passing.
Thanks for the tip, Gregg!