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Bacon-wrapped Ford Fiesta hams it up for International Bacon Day

This is a bacon-wrapped Ford Fiesta. It is a real thing, that a real, multi-billion-dollar company designed. And it isn't even April Fools' Day. Designed for International Bacon Day, which is also apparently a thing, the 2014 Fiesta is finished in Green Envy paint - we're told black paint, like the color of a skillet, made the car look camouflaged - and features 10 gigantic decals depicting strips of tender, cured bacon.
The design, which was approved by the CEO of Benton's Country Hams, Allan Benton, show off the depth of Ford's Custom Graphics program. Unbelievably, Ford will actually start offering bacon decals to everyday customers, including (and we can't believe we're writing this) dual bacon racing stripes which will no doubt have Carroll Shelby spinning and/or salivating in his grave, and a "side of bacon," which wraps a couple of strips over the rear wheels.
Benton, who Ford claims is the King of Bacon, had this to say: "This car just makes so much sense." The Fiesta's marketing manager, Liz Elser added, "It's just awesome to drive down the road in a piece of bacon."

Vile Gossip | Adventures in tire testing

Jean Jennings has been writing about cars for more than 30 years, after stints as a taxicab driver and as a mechanic in the Chrysler Proving Grounds Impact Lab. She was a staff writer at Car and Driver magazine, the first executive editor and former president and editor-in-chief of Automobile Magazine , the founder of the blog Jean Knows Cars and former automotive correspondent for Good Morning America . She has lifetime awards from both the Motor Press Guild and the New England Motor Press Association. This is her first column for Autoblog — look for more Vile Gossip in the future. I began writing at Car and Driver magazine back in its golden age in the 1970s, before I'd actually read it. I knew very little about cars. The only magazine I read religiously was Four Wheeler because I owned big trucks and liked to go off-roading with my Chrysler Proving Grounds friends. My vast 10 years of driving experience up to that point (high-speed dirt-road idiot, taxicab driver, Chrysler Proving Grounds test driver) had less bearing on my being hired at Car and Driver than the fact that the editor just wanted to rile up the all-male staff. He didn't need me for that. They were already in full dudgeon when I arrived. They'd just spent a chunk of time testing a stack of tires for their big tire-test issue, and the editor-in-chief was toe-to-toe with the technical editor over the rankings of the top 10 tires. It was loud, and it was angry. I had no idea that car magazines tested tires. Cab driving had led me to believe that airing up a tire and changing a flat was all you needed to know. I changed so many flats on that cab, I eventually wound up in front of a live audience on the " Oprah Winfrey Show" demonstrating my brilliance with a jack and a tire iron. My point, of course, is that tires are more controversial, and also more essential, than you'd think. My other point is that it's good to get worked up about the subject, but not quite so good to let yourself be seen, as I did, on my hands and knees with my ass up in the air on national TV. This is how I prefer to test a tire: First, pick a top brand. Then accept their invitation to try and beat the crap out of their tire. I chose Yokohama, celebrating its 100th anniversary this year. The big news for them was the GEOLANDER M/T G003!

Ford hires France's former first lady

Celebrity endorsements are nothing new in the auto industry, but Ford is hoping that putting one of France's best-known faces into an odd new ad might get buyers there to consider a Blue Oval rather than a Peugeot or Renault. The company has hired France's former First Lady, singer, and model Carla Bruni to take on the role of an aggressive soccer coach in the new ad. The idea behind the campaign is to get buyers to think about a big switch too. According to Automotive News, Ford holds just a 4.3 percent market share in France. Meanwhile, PSA Peugeot-Citroen has 26 percent, and Renault holds 30 percent. With such a huge discrepancy, even a few tenths in Ford's favor would likely be considered a victory. Ford's actual commercial is an odd piece of auto advertising, though. Not a single vehicle appears in the whole thing, and there isn't a bit of Blue Oval branding on it, either. Although, a link at the end does go to a page for the automaker. You can still watch the video, even if you don't speak French; just be sure to turn on the closed captions.