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The Mercedes-Maybach Pullman Guard is a limo with a bulletproof vest

As fabulously plush as the Mercedes-Maybach Pullman is, there is a certain class of individual for which luxury is only part of the equation. Oligarchs, dictators, kingpins of questionable businesses, and probably some legitimate world leaders all love luxury, but they sometimes face some hairy commutes that demand a bit more protection. For them, the answer to their luxury car needs is the armored Pullman Guard. The Mercedes-Maybach Pullman Guard tops the line of S-Class Guard models that also includes the Mercedes-Benz S600 Guard and the Mercedes-Maybach S600 Guard. Like the non-armored Pullman it packs loads of leather, seats with practically infinite adjustability, and redundant gauges for rear passengers. It is also by far the longest S-Class vehicle available, stretching more than 40 inches longer than the next-longest Mercedes-Maybach. This tremendous length allows the Pullman Guard to have four-passenger seating in the rear, with two seats facing two others. It's the perfect place to sign treaties or entertain diplomats. Or, if foreign affairs aren't your speed, it would also be a convenient place to carve up territory, issue ultimatums to enemies, and intimidate dissidents. The Pullman Guard was developed alongside the standard Pullman, and because of that, the added armor does not sacrifice interior space. The armor does affect weight, though. The Pullman Guard weighs over 11,000 pounds. But, in return, the steel plates on the sides and floor, non-Kevlar-brand high-strength fabrics, and polycarbonate-backed windows protect occupants from bullets and explosives. Plus, the Pullman Guard features a twin-turbo V12 that produces 530 horsepower and 612 lb-ft of torque to haul the added ballast around. If a recognized authority is ordering a Pullman Guard, Mercedes also offers sirens, flashing lights, two-way radios, an emergency starter battery, and a loudspeaker system. These items are sure to be useful when trying to navigate seas of protestors in the streets. All of this extra protection will cost you though, and if you have to ask, you definitely can't afford it. But we'll tell you the price anyway. A standard Pullman will run around $500,000 at current exchange rates. For the Guard model, be prepared to shell out about $1.56 million. It's a steep price for sure, but for those whose pampered lives are in danger, it's probably worth it.

Watch this perfectly nice Mercedes get crushed by a front-end loader

In a world where the YouTube hoax continues to thrive, it's hard to know what to think of this little vid, but here are the facts as we know them: a coupe that looks like a first-generation Mercedes-Benz CLK gets crushed by a giant front-end loader. There you have it.
Our questions arise in the aftermath - we know industrial resource machinery is heavy, but the Benz gets squashed so flat we wonder if someone's trying to play a joke on us. We hear that the white coupe may have been the heavy-equipment operator's foreman's car, but who knows? The on-camera interview seems awfully conveniently placed, yes? See for yourself in the video below and then leave us your thoughts in Comments.

Mercedes-AMG promises something fast is coming

"Something fast is coming." That's all that Mercedes-AMG is saying to accompany this latest teaser video. Don't get us wrong: we don't doubt the power-hungry nuts from Affalterbach for one second. They've got a pretty good track record of delivering the performance goods, after all. We just don't know what it is that they're on about is all. Not that something like that would stop us from hazarding an educated guess, though. Crank up your speakers, play the 19-second video clip and you'll hear what sounds very much like a V8 winding up and down through its rev range. In fact it sounds a lot like the note coming out the back of the Mercedes-AMG GT, which emits a pretty raspy, burblesome noise despite the pair of turbochargers that would ordinarily muffle the song. Couple that noise with flat handling around what looks like Hockenheim and our best guess is that we'll soon be treated to a more hardcore version of the AMG GT – something to slot in between the road-going GT S and the race-spec GT3 (which, it's worth noting, carried over the atmospheric engine from the previous SLS). We spotted such a beast undergoing testing at the Nurburgring just a few months ago, and have been anticipating its arrival ever since. The resulting track toy may not be called the Black Series, but we bet it'll be plenty wicked all the same - whatever it's called.