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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part two

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice. Parker lives in Hawaii and can hold his breath longer than he can go without swearing. For Part One, click here. Or you can skip ahead to Part Three here. I write about surfing for a living. If you can call it a living. Basically means I spend my days fucking around and my wife pays for everything. Because she's got a real job that pays well. Brings home the bacon. Very progressive arrangement. Super twenty first century. I run a surf website, beachgrit.com, with two other guys. It's a strange gig. More or less uncensored. Kind of popular. Very good at alienating advertisers. My behavior has cost us a few bucks. I'm terrible at self-censorship. Know there's a line out there, no idea where it lies. I still don't understand any of the technical side. Might as well be astrophysics or something. For contests I do long rambling write ups. They rarely make much sense. Mainly just talk about my life, whatever random thoughts pop into my head. "Can you do something similar for Le Mans?" "Sure, but I know absolutely fuck-all about racing." "That's okay. Just write what you want." "Will do. But you're gonna need to edit my stuff. Probably censor it heavily." So here I am. I spent the last week trying to learn all I can about the sport of endurance racing. But there's only so much you can jam in your head. And I still don't understand any of the technical side. Might as well be astrophysics or something. While I rambled things were happening. Tracy Krohn spun into the gravel on the Forza chicane. #89 is out of the race after an accident I missed. Pegasus racing hit the wall on the Porsche curves. Bashed up front end, in the garage getting fixed. Toyota and Porsche are swapping back and forth in the front three. Ford back in the lead in GTE Pro. #91 Porsche took a stone through the radiator, down two laps. Not good. The wife and I are one of those weird childless couples that spend way too much time caring for the needs of their pet. French bulldog, Mr Eugene Victor Debs. Great little guy. Spent the last four years training him to be obedient and friendly. Nice thing about dogs, when you're sick of dealing with them you can just lock 'em in another room for a few hours. You don't need to worry about paying for college.

24 Hours of Le Mans live update part one

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice with a profanity-laden stream-of-consciousness writing style. Parker lives in Hawaii and spends far more time spearfishing than behind the wheel of a car. Jump ahead to Part Two here, and Part Three here. Big Money and billionaire hobbyists and rockets on wheels. Jets belching French color smoke overhead. Balance of power fuckery. Plenty of water on the ground this morning. Absurdly expensive motorcars lined up in the pissing rain. Fast twitch lunatics behind the wheel. Chomping at the bit. Let's go let's go let's go! Race hasn't even started, Ford #67 maybe dealing with clutch issues. Karma? That beautiful bastard Brad Pitt's out on the track, waving the tricolor flag. It's a standing start in "Noah's Ark" weather and the 2016 24 hours of Le Mans is go! First lap takes place behind the safety car, finished in a record setting 8 minutes 27 seconds. Wrong kind of record maybe, but this is the first time I've set my mind to watching the whole damn race. Feel like I'm part of history. 3:00 AM on Kauai, a little too early for life. Sucking down coffee like a maniac. Don't fall back asleep. Got my hands on four hours of rest, how much more can I need? Better be enough for the next twenty four hours. Gonna get kinda punchy toward the end. Jason Statham on the scene. Four feet of solid muscle, non-existent hairline. Lovely wife peanut gallery sitting next to me calls him the "best race car drive in the world." Not sure if she's serious. Toss up, could go either way. Statham's a funny guy. Heir to the Bruce Willis comedy action crown. Really good in the movie where the fat comedy lady plays a spy. Ford's on the road. Problems with gearbox pressure, apparently. Nearing a half hour in and the safety car is still on the track. Hellish amounts of water on the ground, in the air. Visibility is garbage. Getting better. Twitter wags, "Not with a bang but a whimper." Just building suspense. Mother Nature felt like killing some people today, race officials need to dial back the drivers until it dries a tad. Normal inclination would've seen 'em flying, guaranteed early lap wrecks. Sad news for that bloodthirsty part of my lizard brain I try and keep suppressed. Good news for humanity. #12 in the pit for a bit.

Ford GT dominates Le Mans qualifying, gets slapped with performance adjustment

Fifty years after Bruce McLaren and Chris Amon drove the Ford GT40 to victory at the 24 Hours of Le Mans, Ford is poised for a historic return to the Circuit de la Sarthe. The new Ford GT took the top two qualifying positions in the LMGTE Pro class, and four of the top five. Ferrari's 488 filled in the rest of the spots in the top seven, the first two from AF Corse. In other words, we're primed for a reboot of the classic Ford-Ferrari feud at this year's race. Or not, as the ACO, which organizes the 24 Hours of Le Mans, announced sweeping pre-race Balance of Performance (BOP) adjustments this morning that make this year's GT class anybody's race. In LMP1, last year's overall winner Porsche locked up the top two spots with the 919 Hybrid and will lead the entire field at race start. Toyota's two-car factory effort followed with qualifying times 1.004 and 2.170 seconds behind the pole lap. Audi rounds out the manufacturer-backed LMP1 class in fifth and sixth. Full qualifying results can be found here. The storyline for the GT cars is perfect - some say too perfect. Ford's class-leading times came after BOP adjustment to the Corvette Racing C7.R before qualifying. BOP is intended to level the playing field in the class by adjusting power, ballast, and fuel capacity. (Check out this explainer video for more, or even just if you love French accents.) But the process is riddled with unknowns and ripe for accusations of sandbagging. That is, if the Ford cars were intentionally slow in practice they could hope for BOP adjustment to improve their race chances. On the Corvette side, last year's GTE Pro winner went from the top of the field to the bottom, barely improving from practice to qualifying. If you think Le Mans is as rigged at the NBA Playoffs, well, it's not that simple. Because if Ford and Ferrari held back until qualifying - the eighth-place Porsche 911 RSR is three-and-a-half seconds off the class pole time - it was a pretty dumb strategy. This morning, the ACO tried to put things back in order by limiting the boost in the Ford GT's twin-turbo V6 and adding 11 pounds of ballast. Ferrari was also given extra weight but allowed more fuel capacity. The Corvette and Aston Martin teams were both given breaks on their air restrictors, which will allow their engines to make more power. Both Ford and Porsche also received extra fuel capacity.

Texan finds creative way to clear highway fast lane

Few things are as infuriating as someone driving slow in the fast lane. A Jeep driver from Texas found himself in just such a predicament near Fort Worth, and came up with a creative way to urge the offending lane-blocker to get a move on. Machine, a YouTuber and off-road enthusiast from the Lone Star State, posted some dashcam footage to his account back in March which showed him stuck behind a slow driver. He was attempting to pass a slow-moving bobtail Peterbilt tractor when he got hung up by a white Ford Econoline squatting in the passing lane. On his YouTube page, Machine stated that the van, which apparently belonged to a plumbing company, was traveling along between 60 and 70 miles per hour along a stretch of highway with a stated speed limit of 70 mph. Confronted with the slow-moving van blocking the left lane, and traffic in the right lane, Machine called the number on the back of the Econoline and politely asked him to get out of the way. In the Econoline, the passenger picked up and was momentarily confused as Machine asked him to ask his driver to move out of the lane and let traffic pass. The van sped up, passed a tractor-trailer, and got out of the way, much to the relief of the traffic behind him. According to CBS news, 38 states have laws on the books to punish slow drivers squatting in the passing lane. In five of those states, the fine is upwards of $1000, and 22 states classify it as a misdemeanor. Related Video: News Source: YouTube, CBS News Auto News Humor Weird Car News Ford Jeep Driving Safety Minivan/Van SUV Commercial Vehicles wrangler passing lane

2017 Honda Ridgeline enters the landscape block war

In the test of pickup truck beds, if steel is apples and aluminum is oranges, Honda wants you to know that composites are pineapples. Chevy recently performed a test in which its own Silverado was pitted against its most obvious competitor, the Ford F-150. A loader dropped over 800 pounds of landscaping blocks into the two truck beds, and Ford's aluminum bed ended up with more damage than Chevy's steel bed. Check that test out right here. Honda apparently wasn't content to let Chevy throw stones alone. In a new test, the Japanese automaker replicated the block-drop test using its brand-new Ridgeline truck, which features a composite bed. As you'll see in the video above, there was very little damage to the high-strength plastic bed of the Ridgeline after a similar load of landscaping blocks were dropped from a loader. Without being on hand at any of these tests, we can't say with any degree of certainty that they match up in severity. But they all look pretty similar, and this is actually a test that Honda performed in front of journalists ( ourselves included) earlier this year. We visually inspected the composite bed of a Ridgeline after a demonstration just like the one on video above, and can confirm that there was basically no damage to Honda's truck. Chevy went an extra step by flinging a heavy toolbox into the Silverado and F-150; Honda didn't match that particular test. Does any of this matter? That's up to truck buyers and owners to decide, naturally, but we doubt anyone would actually dump a load like this into their own truck. And it's also worth noting that a heavy-duty spray-on bedliner would probably minimize damage to the metal surface below, whether steel or aluminum. If nothing else, it's memorable marketing. Related Video:

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Rare Ford Mustang ASC McLaren is a piece of '80s history

You can't blame the dealer for advertising this oddball convertible as a "Ford Mustang McLaren." The name certainly rolls off the tongue better than "Ford Mustang ASC McLaren," and it makes the car sound a whole lot more appealing. However, without the 'ASC' in there, you don't get the full picture. And when it comes to the world of strange automotive collaborations—particularly those of the 80s—you most definitely want the full picture. ASC McLaren Mustangs were the result of fortuitous timing, and a project that was already underway between the American Sunroof Company and McLaren (no, not that McLaren). Detroit custom car builder Peter Muscat brought the idea of a Mustang with a tonneau cover to ASC after chopping the top off a Fox body on his own, and in turn ASC founder Heinz Pretcher brought the concept to Ford. Big blue was already in the midst of relaunching a Mustang convertible, which had been absent from the lineup for 10 years, so initially it was the Mercury Capri that got the ASC/McLaren treatment. The result was a car that was more expensive than a Mustang GT, and coupled with declining sales of the Capri overall, the car was discontinued in 1986, paving the way for the ASC McLaren Mustang you see here on eBay. With the change over to the Mustang as their platform for modification in 1987, ASC McLaren were given the opportunity to create something notable. Customizing the Capri was one thing, but the Mustang name carries with it iconic status. So what did ASC McLaren do with their chance to leave their mark on automotive history? They gave the car some visual modifications, both inside and out, but like the Capri, left the powertrain untouched. Also like the Capri, the cars still ended up costing more than $20,000. Between the high price, the economic woes of the late 80s, and disputes between Muscat and Pretcher, the ASC McLaren Mustangs were no more by 1990. During the three year run, 1,806 ASC McLaren conversions were completed, making them quite rare, especially low mileage examples like this one. The 5.0 V8s are known for being stout engines, capable of handling serious modification, and logging lots of miles, so there are no concerns there. The 5-speed Borg-Warner transmission that came in all Mustang GTs is also known for being a durable unit, the '87-'90 versions especially so. The main concern here would be the life the car has lived, and more importantly where it has lived.

May 2016: FCA wins, Ford and GM stumble on weak car volumes

The May 2016 sales numbers are in, and it looks as though FCA is getting some vindication for boldly cancelling two slow-selling car models. Meanwhile, Ford saw overall sales dip and GM's May volume took a big dive versus the same month in 2015. While Marchionne's decision to axe the Chrysler 200 and Dodge Dart has drawn criticism as being short-sighted, it's working for FCA so far. Although the Dart and 200 aren't out of production yet and no capacity has been shifted to crossover or trucks, May's numbers show that the emphasis on Jeep and Ram models makes sense right now. FCA's US sales rose 1 percent last month compared to May 2015, putting the year-to-date total at 955,186 vehicles, an increase of 6 percent compared to the same period last year. Standouts included the Jeep Renegade, Compass, and Patriot, and the Fiat 500X. Ram pickup sales were down 3 percent. And your fun fact is that Alfa Romeo sales were up precisely 10 percent, for a total of 44 4Cs sold versus 40 in the same month last year. At FoMoCo, the Ford brand took a hit to the tune of 6.4 percent from May 2015 to 2016, registering 226,190 sales last month. Lincoln showed improvement on its modest numbers, going from 9,174 to 9,807, a 6.9 percent increase. Overall, Ford was down 5.9 percent for the month to 235,997; despite the slump, year-to-date total Ford sales are up 4.2 percent to 1,112,939. Strong sellers included Escape, Expedition, F-Series, and Transit - big stuff. Most small and/or efficient models (Fiesta, Focus, Fusion, C-Max) saw sales slides. Fusion sales were also down, likely due to effects of model changeover to the freshened 2017 model. Ford has promised four new crossovers and SUVs by 2020 and if things keep trending this way the company will be able to sell them, but things could change in the next four years. GM saw the worst of it for domestic brands. Retail and fleet sales were down for each of the four divisions, with the May 2016 total dropping 18 percent to 240,450 vehicles. GM's year-to-date sales are down 5.0 percent in 2016 to 1,183,705. Both the Sierra and Silverado were down significantly, and the majority of Chevy, Buick, GMC, and Cadillac nameplates saw sales decreases, with both small cars and larger utilities included. Not even big stuff could help GM this month, it seems. We'll have more on the rest of the industry's May sales as those figures trickle in.

Ford recalls 1.9m cars and crossovers for defective airbags

The Basics: Ford is recalling a total of 1,898,728 vehicles to replace defective Takata front passenger-side airbags. This includes the 2007-2010 Ford Edge, 2006-2011 Ford Fusion, 2005-2011 Ford Mustang, 2007-2011 Ford Ranger, 2007-2010 Lincoln MKX and 2006-2011 Lincoln MKZ, Zephyr and Mercury Milan vehicles built in North America. The Problem: The defective airbags have been linked to ruptures that can send metal fragments at the passenger, due to deteriorating propellant. Injuries/Deaths: Ford claims it's not aware of any injuries due to the problem, but rupturing Takata airbags have been linked to a series of serious injuries and deaths. The Fix: Dealers will replace the passenger-side frontal airbag at no charge to the customer. If you own one: Look out for a letter from the manufacturer to arrange service at your local dealer. If you'd like to check if your vehicle is affected, click on the safety recalls link on Ford.com and enter your VIN. Related Video: