1969 Dodge Coronet Super Bee on 2040-cars

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FCA is setting a five-year strategy: Here's how the last one played out

We're slightly more than four years removed from Sergio Marchionne last five-year plan for FCA, a tell-all where the Italian-American automaker divulged its plans for the 2014 through 2018 model years. It was a grand affair, where Sergio told FCA investors that all was right in Auburn Hills, Alfa Romeo and Maserati were making comebacks, and the fifth-gen Dodge Viper received a mid-cycle refresh. You can read every last one of those past predictions right here. We're on our way to Europe to see Sergio's sequel, coming out Friday straight from FCA's Italian headquarters. (Bloomberg reports a plan to expand Jeep and Ram globally, combine Alfa Romeo and Maserati into a single division for an eventual spinoff, and downsizing Fiat and Chrysler. Also, EVs.) But before we arrive in Italy and find out exactly what Marchionne has planned for 2019 through 2023 as his last act as CEO, let's take a minute to tally up the results of his last term based on the same scoresheet we used in 2014. Now, we're only five months into 2018, so much of this — including vehicles like the Ram HD and Jeep Grand Wagoneer — could still debut this year. For those, we'll mark things TBD. We're not going to draw any conclusions or make any objectionable remarks. We're simply going to let the stats speak for themselves.

1970 Dodge Charger destroyed by man sick of lowballers — he showed them!

There are open and shut cases, and there's this one, the purchase and crush case. This is so wild it's hard to believe it's real. Apparently a man named Daniel Gagliardi bought a rusted-out 1970 Dodge Charger project car with the intent to flip it. Contacted by The Drive, Gagliardi said he bought the car for $4,200 and listed it for $8,500. "It was a complete car," he said, "not missing a single thing inside, out, underneath, under the hood, wasn't missing a damn thing. Had fender tag, VIN tag, clean title." Instead of negotiating with serious buyers, Gagliardi told the outlet a stream of jokers jerked him around for six months. The time-wasting took a toll, and after 180 days of "no-showers, thousands of no-showers, and a whole bunch of flakers" who didn't have the decency to bring a decent offer and cash, he decided to teach them all a lesson. So he destroyed the car, filmed the destruction, and cheered it on. The humorous and ironic part of the video is when Gagliardi tells another man off-camera, "But we got it first! We already robbed it, you can only rob it once!" After that levity, there's only chagrin for anyone sad to see a Charger meet its end so spitefully. Admittedly, however, and in spite of all the vitriol aimed at him, Gagliardi is free to destroy his own property. He's not the first person to crush a car capriciously. Any divorce attorney could tell you a book of tales about precious goods meeting ugly ends for vindictive reasons. Or there's the guy who, commenting on Gagliardi's video on another site, relates how he crushed the Yamaha quad he wanted $800 for after he "got tired of people offering me $200." Ah well. This won't be the last time. Warning for language, and exceptionally shaky video. If you're hungry for more Charger carnage after this, check out the cinematic obliterations in "7 Ways to Destroy a Charger."

Barracuda's Dodge branding no biggie, but what about engines?

Rumors about a revival of the Barracuda nameplate have been circulating for years now, though which brand it might fall under has been a bit of a mystery. Initial speculation had the car labeled an SRT product, but that acronym has since returned to its former role as a sub-brand for top-performance Mopars. Thanks to leaks from a recent FCA dealership event, we know the Barracuda is back on the table but will be sold under the Dodge umbrella, a move that has been generating a bit of ire from Pentastar fanatics, as the car was originally part of the defunct Plymouth brand. Given what's known about the new model, however, the badge is the least of my concerns about the new car. Let's start with the re-branding itself. This isn't the first time Chrysler has shuffled models around to different brands. The current-generation Viper spent two years as the flagship model under the SRT banner, only to return to Dodge for 2015 when SRT resumed its former role as a sub-brand. Years ago, the Neon was sold as a Plymouth, a Dodge, and a Chrysler model, depending on where you shopped for one. When Plymouth ceased to exist, the last few years of Prowler production got Chrysler badges instead. Then there's the new Jeep Renegade, a model whose name was born out of a trim level. The Barracuda might not turn out to be a muscle car in the way we currently define them. Further examples of naming liberties taken throughout automotive history could fill a book, but suffice it to say that these days a model's name has very little to do with the vehicle itself or any legacy it might have. The Barracuda name might be a particularly sacred cow with enthusiasts, but to me, a much bigger concern is the fact that the car might not turn out to be a muscle car in the way we currently define them. News from the Fiat Chrysler dealer briefing earlier this week indicates that when the next Charger debuts it will share its platform with the Barracuda, much the way the Charger and Challenger are twinned now. One difference is that the Barracuda is tipped to be offered as a convertible, while the modern Challenger is tintop-only. The Charger and Barracuda will use the rear-drive platform developed for Alfa Romeo's new Giulia, itself designed as a BMW M3 fighter both from a dimensional and dynamic standpoint; the Barracuda is expected to be slightly smaller than the current Challenger.