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Clever video selling Saturn Ion "sex machine" will catch your eye

"When I think of the most impressive, industry changing, earth shattering vehicles of recent history, the first car that comes to my mind is the 2004 Saturn Ion Coupe." So says Brad Holt of Dallas, Texas. And he's right, clearly. One look at the specific specimen Holt is selling will be enough to convince you that the car "will absolutely tickle every one of your fancies," as claimed by the seller himself.
We suggest you watch the video below to see just how perfectly Holt's sex machine will fit into your life. The end result will no doubt be exactly as Holt ends his video: "You need it. Like a lot." You can also read more info from Brad in an interview here. If only our offices were a little closer to Dallas...

Car thief lands Saturn on Fresno roof

Residents of a Fresno, California apartment building recently awoke to debris falling from their ceiling after a car thief managed to execute a perfect parking job on the structure's roof. Police say 26-year-old Benjamin Tucker stole the Saturn sedan from a nearby house before striking either a curb or some rocks, vaulting the vehicle into the air and onto the roof. After seeing his predicament, Tucker leapt from the roof and fled the scene. Or at least he tried to. Tucker broke his leg in the fall and only made it around a quarter of a mile from the crash when police picked him up.
No one else was harmed in the stunt.
Tucker had two outstanding warrants for his arrest at the time for a hit-and-run and evading police. A special crane had to be called in to remove the Saturn from the apartment roof and the structure will indeed require repairs. Hit the jump for a news report on the incident.

GM nixes fleet-only Chevy Captiva Sport

Well, guys, it looks like Saturn is finally dead in the United States once and for all. According to Automotive News, Chevrolet has discontinued production of its fleet-only Captiva Sport - a rebadged Saturn Vue - after three years on the market. The very last US-spec Captiva Sport was built in Mexico in August. GM will still produce the vehicle for sale in the Mexican market, as well as for export.
GM initially offered the Captiva Sport for rental fleets as a way to free up capacity for the sightly larger Chevy Equinox and GMC Terrain crossovers, which, according to AN, had been in short supply. The Captiva Sport also did a nice job protecting the resale values of its other similar-sized CUVs because they didn't have to play in the fleet market. But with Chevrolet preparing to launch its subcompact Trax CUV in the US, the automaker will soon have a clear, three-tier crossover lineup without the Captiva Sport. The Trax fills out the bottom end, followed by the Equinox and the seven-passenger Traverse.
For now, renters seeking a taste of 'Classic GM' will have to whet their appetites with the fullsize Impala Limited.