1967 Volkswagen Beetle - Classic Custom Convertible on 2040-cars

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Even 'basic' girls are tired of their cheating VW Jettas

Well, this didn't take long. Former Volkswagen CEO Martin Winterkorn's office probably hasn't even been packed yet, and the jokes about his scandal-ridden former employer have already begun to fly. Today, we'll be featuring the team from Funny Or Die, which has opted to not only skewer Volkswagen for its TDIsaster, but one of the victims of the company's catastrophe – the 'basic' girl. For those not in the know, "basic," according to Urban Dictionary is an adjective reserved for someone "devoid of defining characteristics that might make a person interesting, extraordinary, or just simply worth devoting time or attention to," and that they are "lacking intelligence and unable to socialize on even an elementary level." And when it comes to basic girls, the Volkswagen Jetta is as ubiquitous as a Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte. But with the VW controversy, basic girls are finding their Jettas aren't so good for their green credentials. So check out Funny Or Die's take on these scorned drivers, in the video above. And fair warning, there's a bit of foul language.

Small 3-row crossover SUVs specifications compared on paper

There's no shortage of three-row vehicles on the market for carrying seven or more people and their stuff wherever they all need to go. Just about every car company has at least one large crossover or traditional SUV with three rows of seats, and there are still plenty of minivans to pick from. But most of these vehicles are large, pricey, and frequently thirsty. Fortunately, there are still a handful of smaller crossovers that deliver 7-passenger capability in a smaller, cheaper package. We've gathered four of the small three-row set here to compare them based on space, power, fuel economy, pricing, and more. They include the very old Dodge Journey, the slightly less old Mitsubishi Outlander and Kia Sorento, and the relatively new Volkswagen Tiguan. You can see the raw numbers in the chart below, followed by a more detailed breakdown and some notes on how we like each of these vehicles. For in-depth opinions on the vehicles, be sure to check out our full reviews, and if you want to compare these with other vehicles, try out our comparison tools. Engines, transmissions and performance Interestingly, three of the four crossovers here utilize similar engines for their four-cylinder offerings. The Dodge, Kia and Mitsubishi all feature naturally aspirated 2.4-liter four-cylinder engines. Only the Volkswagen Tiguan chooses turbocharging and a smaller 2.0-liter displacement. But because of its turbocharger, the Tiguan's four-cylinder is easily the most potent, making a healthy 221 pound-feet of torque, which is more than 40 more than the Sorento, the crossover with the next most torque. The VW is also second-most powerful, just one horse behind the Sorento. The Outlander is the least powerful in the four-cylinder class. The Journey is only barely better, but it will probably feel as slow or worse thanks to its ancient 4-speed automatic. The four-cylinder Sorento and Outlander each have 6-speed automatic transmissions, and the VW has an 8-speed. The Sorento with a V6 has an 8-speed, too. View 17 Photos Moving up to the V6 class, the Outlander is once again at the bottom. It actually makes less torque than the turbo VW Tiguan. The Journey and Sorento are almost perfectly matched. The Journey makes a bit more torque; the Sorento makes a bit more power. The Journey also gets upgraded to a 6-speed automatic. Another powertrain consideration to bare in mind is whether all-wheel-drive is necessary.

Volkswagen Passat gets Wolfsburg Edition, priced from $23,495*

Volkswagen has just announced a new Passat Wolfsburg Edition, which slots between the base S and mid-grade SE trims in terms of content and price. The automaker has not released any official photos of the car as of this writing (aside from the badge shot you see here, of course), but the Wolfsburg Passat will be visually set apart from the rest by a unique set of 16-inch alloy wheels.
The big host of upgrades for the Wolfsburg Edition are found inside, where buyers will enjoy standard amenities like leatherette seats (with bun-warmers on the front chairs), a power driver's seat, satellite radio and a media interface with iPod connectivity. Of course, this comes on top of the already standard Passat features like Bluetooth and auto on/off headlamps. The Wolfsburg Passat will only be available with the 2.5-liter five-cylinder engine and a six-speed automatic transmission.
Look for the 2013 Wolfsburg Edition Passat to hit dealerships in the very near future, priced from $23,495, *not including $795 for destination. Have a look below for Volkswagen's official press blast.