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This man literally loves a Porsche [NSFW]

Think you know what "auto erotic" means? Think again. Because one man in Thailand has redefined the term. Caught on security camera footage this guy lurks into a garage, looks over both shoulders, evidently misses the camera, drops trou and has his way with a Porsche Boxster. When the tailpipe proved too hot (or otherwise inhospitable), he moves up to the radiator grille and – ahem – finishes up there. Sadly this isn't even the first time we've come across this particular perversion. We'd urge caution before viewing the video, not only because it's not suitable for a workplace environment, but because once you see it, you're bound to repeatedly blurt out, "Why, man!? Why?"

Woman rushing to pub nearly causes head-on collision

A woman in a rush to pick up her husband from a local pub caused this close call on a street in England this weekend. The near miss happened on Sunday on the B1253 between Rudston and Bridlington, East Yorkshire, England. A Porsche Cayenne driver attempted to overtake a blue Citroen on a blind curve but didn't see the white Skoda in oncoming traffic. Thanks to the Skoda driver's quick maneuvering on to the grassy shoulder the Cayenne only caused minor damage to the other two cars. Damian Hodgson is the owner of the dashboard camera who was behind the blue Citroen. After the close call Hodgson first stopped to check on the Skoda driver. Driver and car were okay, but a 10-year-old girl in the front seat was in tears. Hodgson then made his way down the road where the Porsche driver was speaking to the Citroen driver. He said the Porsche's driver gave some pretty lame reasons for putting so many people's lives in danger. "She said she was picking her husband up from the pub and was wearing a pair of slippers - but it's no excuse to be overtaking on a blind bend," Hodgson told the Mirror. "She did tell me she always overtakes at that spot though." Hodgson picked up the dashcam after a crash while on vacation in Florida last month. He offered the footage to both the drivers of the Skoda and the Citroen, but both declined. Hodgson told the Mirror that he hopes some good comes from the incident. "If anything comes of this, it is hopefully that the lady Porsche driver has learned a lesson and she will not put others in danger again." Related Video: News Source: The Mirror Weird Car News Porsche Citroen Skoda Driving Safety dashboard camera near miss

Audi welcomes Porsche back to Le Mans like any sibling would

Ah, sibling rivalry. It really is a beautiful thing. It's even more beautiful when said siblings are automakers with very, very well-known racing histories. That's how you get videos like this, which is Audi's way of welcoming Porsche back to the top flight of Le Mans racing.
Yes, Audi has taken its R18 E-Tron Quattro back onto public roads, wowing schoolboys and scaring farmers (who appear to be riding classic Porsche tractors), as it travels from Ingolstadt to Zuffenhausen, just to taunt its corporate frenemy.
Take a look below for a video to see just what that teasing looks like.