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Man sells testicle to buy Nissan 370Z

We aren't entirely sure what's stranger about this story - that a man actually sold a vital piece of his manhood for a car, or that he did it for a Nissan 370Z. That's not to discredit the trusty Fairlady, a car we generally like, but that if we were to do what Mark Parisi did and sell one of his testicles to science, we'd be asking for a helluva lot more than $35,000.
But Parisi did just that, and announced live on CBS' The Doctors (we really can't make this up) that the sale of his nut would go towards the purchase of a Z. According to our friends Down Under (Australia, get your mind out of the gutter), $35K is the going rate for one slightly used testicle, so if you get nothing else from this story, gentlemen, know that you have $70,000 swinging between your legs.

Nissan and Carlos Ghosn settle SEC claims over undisclosed compensation

WASHINGTON — Nissan and its former Chief Executive Carlos Ghosn have agreed to settle claims from the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission over false financial disclosures related to Ghosn's compensation, an SEC statement said on Monday. Nissan will pay $15 million, while Ghosn agreed to a $1 million civil penalty and a 10-year ban from serving as an officer or director of a publicly traded U.S. company, the SEC statement said. Ghosn was arrested in Japan and fired by Nissan last year. He is awaiting trial in Tokyo on financial misconduct charges that he denies. Former Nissan human resources official Gregory Kelly agreed to a $100,000 penalty and a five-year officer and director ban. Nissan, Ghosn, and Kelly settled without admitting or denying the SEC's allegations and findings. The SEC said in total Nissan in its financial disclosures omitted more than $140 million to be paid to Ghosn in retirement — a sum that ultimately was not paid. The SEC also accused Ghosn in a suit filed in New York that he engaged in a scheme to conceal more than $90 million of compensation. That suit is being settled as part of the agreement announced Monday. Nissan confirmed it had settled the allegations and said it "is firmly committed to continuing to further cultivate robust corporate governance." Nissan provided significant cooperation to the SEC, the agency said. The company now has a new governance structure with three statutory committees — audit, compensation and nomination — and has amended its securities reports for all relevant years. The SEC said beginning in 2004 Nissan's board delegated to Ghosn the authority to set individual director and executive compensation levels, including his own. The SEC said "Ghosn and his subordinates, including Kelly, crafted various ways to structure payment of the undisclosed compensation after Ghosn's retirement, such as entering into secret contracts, backdating letters to grant Ghosn interests in Nissan's Long Term Incentive Plan, and changing the calculation of Ghosn's pension allowance to provide more than $50 million in additional benefits." "Investors are entitled to know how, and how much, a company compensates its top executives. Ghosn and Kelly went to great lengths to conceal this information from investors and the market," said Stephanie Avakian, co-director of the SEC's Division of Enforcement.

Watch these Super Bowl car commercials [UPDATE]

On Sunday, February 3, the New England Patriots take on the Los Angeles Rams in Super Bowl 53 at Mercedes-Benz Stadium in Atlanta, Georgia. Some will watch because of the storyline of the old-school dynasty facing off against the new-school wunderkinds, but a large chunk of people will solely be watching for the commercials. Lucky for those who slot into the latter category, many of the manufacturers release their super bowl ads ahead of time, or have simply opted to release the commercials only online. Scroll down to see what car companies have already shown their cards. Audi Audi goes the comedic route in its clip for the Big Game. It starts with a grandpa showing his grandson a gorgeous Audi e-tron GT tucked away in a garage before he's shaken awake. Turns out he was just choking on a cashew in his cubicle at his boring job. Dodge Dodge does what it knows: create enough smoke to punch more holes in the ozone layer. Set to "The Devil Went Down to Georgia (the Super Bowl is in Atlanta, get it!?), a Challenger SRT Hellcat widebody, Charger SRT Hellcat, and Durango SRT are seen ripping through a city, leaving a trail of rubber crumbs in their wakes. Genesis Genesis has not yet released a commercial prior to the Super Bowl, but it is the official luxury vehicle of the NFL. Because of this, Genesis is hosting a fan experience for 10 days before the game. It will showcase the brand's cars, offer games, and have photos opportunities and autograph days. Hyundai Jason Bateman alert! Hyundai is one of the few companies to hook a major celebrity for its advertisement, and the casting is perfect. Bateman plays a doorman who takes people to various terrible events in life, including root canals, the middle seat, and shopping for a car. The ad centers around Hyundai's Shopper Assurance, which is Hyundai's new method for car shopping. Jeep An old 1963 Jeep Gladiator finds its strength in the crusher and transforms into a a new 2020 Gladiator, with a firm declaration that the nameplate is officially back. Kia Through Kia's commercial, a young boy wonders out loud what it'd be like if the millions spent on Super Bowl commercials were used to help others.