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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part one

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice with a profanity-laden stream-of-consciousness writing style. Parker lives in Hawaii and spends far more time spearfishing than behind the wheel of a car. Jump ahead to Part Two here, and Part Three here. Big Money and billionaire hobbyists and rockets on wheels. Jets belching French color smoke overhead. Balance of power fuckery. Plenty of water on the ground this morning. Absurdly expensive motorcars lined up in the pissing rain. Fast twitch lunatics behind the wheel. Chomping at the bit. Let's go let's go let's go! Race hasn't even started, Ford #67 maybe dealing with clutch issues. Karma? That beautiful bastard Brad Pitt's out on the track, waving the tricolor flag. It's a standing start in "Noah's Ark" weather and the 2016 24 hours of Le Mans is go! First lap takes place behind the safety car, finished in a record setting 8 minutes 27 seconds. Wrong kind of record maybe, but this is the first time I've set my mind to watching the whole damn race. Feel like I'm part of history. 3:00 AM on Kauai, a little too early for life. Sucking down coffee like a maniac. Don't fall back asleep. Got my hands on four hours of rest, how much more can I need? Better be enough for the next twenty four hours. Gonna get kinda punchy toward the end. Jason Statham on the scene. Four feet of solid muscle, non-existent hairline. Lovely wife peanut gallery sitting next to me calls him the "best race car drive in the world." Not sure if she's serious. Toss up, could go either way. Statham's a funny guy. Heir to the Bruce Willis comedy action crown. Really good in the movie where the fat comedy lady plays a spy. Ford's on the road. Problems with gearbox pressure, apparently. Nearing a half hour in and the safety car is still on the track. Hellish amounts of water on the ground, in the air. Visibility is garbage. Getting better. Twitter wags, "Not with a bang but a whimper." Just building suspense. Mother Nature felt like killing some people today, race officials need to dial back the drivers until it dries a tad. Normal inclination would've seen 'em flying, guaranteed early lap wrecks. Sad news for that bloodthirsty part of my lizard brain I try and keep suppressed. Good news for humanity. #12 in the pit for a bit.

Will Ford's SUV blitz include the Bronco?

Ford announced this week it will add four sport-utility vehicles in the next four years, an ambitious bet on a segment the industry once shunned. This led to wild speculation about what form these utes will take. Here's what we know: They will be new nameplates, and Ford is thinking globally. That means at least one might not be a product with US intent. They will also be in segments where the company does not currently compete, Ford said. The Blue Oval isn't specifying exactly what's it's doing, so here are some of our theories. We think one will be called the Bronco, which is great news for enthusiasts. We hope it follows the Mustang playbook with some heritage styling, but a thoroughly modern execution. Ford needs an off-road Jeep Wrangler-fighter. Fuel prices are low and it's been 22 years since the infamous O.J. Simpson white Bronco chase. This is the best chance Ford will ever have to bring back this iconic name. Our man on the ground at the Chicago Auto show, Sebastian Blanco, reported that Ford sales and marketing vice president Mark LaNeve said a "mini utility" will also be one of the utes. This could be primarily an overseas play. We've also seen lots of spy shots of the EcoSport, a small crossover that Ford sells in India and other overseas markets, being tested on American roads. That is an existing nameplate. Maybe Ford adds a small ute related to the EcoSport in the United States, but calls it something else. We think Lincoln gets a three-row SUV out of the deal. It could slot between the MKX, which was new last year, and the Navigator. Lincoln is leaving money on the table by not being in this segment. The platform could be used for a Ford at some point, too. The Blue Oval brand does actually have a tweener three-row vehicle, the Flex, but this chassis might underpin a replacement. Or maybe Ford makes one of these a hybrid. The company laid out ambitious plans in December to ramp up its electrification strategy, something that could mean a dedicated hybrid SUV (Kia unveiled one of those right after LaNeve's speech in Chicago). It's also possible hybrid technology will be integrated into this new portfolio. The Escape used to have a hybrid sibling. Whatever form they ultimately take, Ford is betting heavily on SUVs. The company thinks they are what Baby Boomers and Millenials want and expects the segment will continue to grow. It's important to note: this will be a diversified strategy.

Ford continues autonomous tech development

Some of the autonomous-driving features that Ford offers in Europe will come to the United States as soon as next year. The Blue Oval will add the pre-collision assist and pedestrian detection technologies that it has already installed on the Mondeo sedan in Europe. Those features, part of what Ford calls the "second of three phases" in driverless technology, will be brought stateside in a yet-to-be disclosed model, while most of Ford's US vehicle line will have the features by 2019. It has been testing an automated Fusion for more than a year. Ford is looking to build upon the autonomous-vehicle technology that it already has on models such as the Fusion, Taurus, F-150, Edge, and Explorer. Those amenities include active-park assist, lane-departure warning, and blind-spot monitoring. Ford said early last year that it was working with the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) and Stanford University to develop algorithms for use in driverless cars. The effort is part of Ford's so-called "Blueprint for Mobility" geared toward autonomous driving features that are being developed over the next decade. FORD COLLABORATES WITH SILICON VALLEY INNOVATION ECOSYSTEM ON AUTONOMOUS VEHICLES, 3D PRINTING, WEARABLE TECHNOLOGY Autonomous vehicle technology is another step closer to production at Ford – moving from a research effort to an advanced engineering project Ford announces it is working with Silicon Valley-based 3D-printing firm Carbon3D to quickly produce high-quality automotive-grade parts Ford kicks off wearable technology development with MyFord® Mobile app extension – coming soon to smartwatches including Android Wear – providing customers the ability to check vehicle driving range, battery charge and more for their plug-in hybrid or electric vehicle quickly from their wrists Autonomous vehicle technology is another step closer to production at Ford, moving from a research effort to an advanced engineering program, the company announced today. Ford has appointed a director of autonomous vehicle development – 29-year Ford veteran Randy Visintainer – and created a global team to work on the advanced program. Ford Research and Innovation Center Palo Alto is working on the global Ford team to deliver the Ford Smart Mobility plan, which aims to take the company to the next level in connectivity, mobility, autonomous vehicles, the customer experience and big data.