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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part three

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice. Parker lives in Hawaii and has an associates degree in dropping f-bombs. For Part One, click here. Part Two is here. Really hoped I'd be able to grab an hour or two of sleep before the sun rose over Le Mans. Dark dark dark, couldn't figure out what was going on. Commentators struggled at times as well. But I couldn't do it. Endurance racing is just too exciting. Grabs my attention with both fists. Screams, "watch these men DRIVE!" A neighbor invited me over for drinks. Told him, "Can't do it, gotta watch Le Mans!" Maybe not exactly. I'll admit, at times my attention wandered. I did a load of laundry. Ate some snacks. Half listened to the commentary. Threw a hump at my wife. I learned that Patrick Long, driving #88, is big brother to Kevin "Spanky" Long. Spanky's a bit of a legend in the skate world. Always weird how top notch talent can run in families like that. Kind of surprised I've never heard that before. Worked for a skate mag for a years, met Spanky a handful of times. Someone must've told me that he has an older brother who drives race cars. Dash cams at night are scary. High powered headlights in the P1s reach almost 300 meters. Cars outrun that distance easy. Seems like they're just steering into the black and hoping for the best. But that can't be the case. People'd be dropping dead let and right. Very amused by how the guys in GT are like, "Dude, stop flashing your fucking lights before you pass." But the LMP's are all, "Suck a dick! I do what I want." Top three stayed neck and neck nearly all night long. As the sun gets ready to creep back over the horizon the top three are separated by only eleven and a half seconds. Toyota 5 and 6, Porsche 2. Audi 8 is two laps behind Porsche, beleaguered 7 is dealing with constant trouble eleven laps from the front. GTE Pro sees Ferrari 82 in first, Ford 68 and 69 right behind. To win you've gotta drive perfect, build perfect. Fours cars retired so far. I'm beginning to appreciate the endurance aspect a little more fully. Only really considered the drivers at first. The mental and physical stress driving these cars at these speeds at length would inflict. But keeping the damn things running is the real deal. To win you've gotta drive perfect, build perfect.

Ford rakes in record $2.5b profit during Q1 of 2016

Fears that the auto industry is due for a downturn may be fading. Ford posted record profits in the first quarter of 2016, the company announced Thursday. Chief financial officer Bob Shanks said Ford enjoyed its best quarterly performance in history, generating operating profits of $3.8 billion and a record profit margin of 9.8 percent. Overall, the company's $2.5 billion profit in the quarter more than doubled from the 2015 quarterly results. "The first quarter was an absolutely terrific start to the year, an all-time record for the company, with very strong performance across the business," said chief executive officer Mark Fields. "We're excited about our future and confident in our ability to deliver long-term growth and profitability as we expand our business model to be both an auto and a mobility company." During the quarter, Ford announced the creation of Ford Smart Mobility, a new subsidiary that would vet future mobility projects in the realm of car-sharing, fractional ownership and autonomous deployment. The company also kicked off a billion-dollar makeover of its Dearborn, Michigan campus and headquarters. The company's after-tax earnings of $0.68 per share trumped Wall Street's expectations, and were significantly up from $0.39 per share a year ago. The results were buoyed by the company's fourth consecutive quarter of growth in Europe, which comes after a long period of stagnant sales. Ford's earnings results come amid reports that April car sales are on pace to jump 4 percent year over year, which would make it the best-selling April in history. Kelley Blue Book projects that car sales will reach 1.51 million this month, placing the industry on track for 17.5 million vehicles sold in 2016. Even as SUV and crossover sales drive the market, analysts say Nissan and Honda are positioned to benefit from renewed interest in mid-size cars. "Following a disappointing March, we expect sales to get back on track in April with SAAR in the mid-17 million range," said Tim Fleming, analyst for Kelley Blue Book. "Increased fleet sales and rising incentive spending among automakers remain the factors to watch, but the retail demand appears to be holding steady, signaling the industry's strong run isn't over quite yet." Related Video: Image Credit: Getty Earnings/Financials Ford Lincoln 5g Connectivity mobility auto industry financial

Justin Bell makes a horrible policeman

If you're wondering what type of person makes a good police officer, it seems a racecar driver doesn't. Let us rephrase that: Justin Bell, a racecar driver and the host of Motor Trend's World's Fastest Car Show, recently got behind the wheel of a 5.0-liter Ford Mustang police car with Sergeant Daniel Shrubb, co-founder of DRAGG (Drag Racing Against Gangs and Graffiti), and proved that his high-performance-driving skillset is a bit too aggressive for police duty.
While it's easy to get carried away in a Mustang GT, a patrol car driver must maintain some sort of restraint while pursuing a criminal, so as not to come off as a reckless driver to the public. We'll admit, some pursuit techniques are counter-intuitive to performance driving (stay off the gas in a lane-change exercise?), but Bell's judicious use of the handbrake can't be normal procedure.
Watch "The One With The Ford Mustang 5.0 Police Car" (yes, we caught the Friends reference too) below to see some shenanigans in one of Michigan's finest patrol cars.