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Online Find Of The Day: 2008 Cadillac XLR picks up where Excalibur left off

We try very, very hard to keep snark away from creations like the one you see here. After all, someone poured plenty of enthusiasm, time and money into turning a 2008 Cadillac XLR into a modern interpretation of the new-old cars typically done by cottage builders like Excalibur and Clénet. Even so, it's hard not to wince when you set an eye on this machine. With its wheelbase stretched to accommodate the extra bodywork, goofy sidewalls and upkicked nose (examine it in profile, it looks slightly bent in the middle), this "neoclassic" takes whatever was loveable about the Cadillac underneath and buries it in a tacky grave.
Miraculously, the engine bay has been left unmolested, which means the retractable hardtop convertible still features a 4.6-liter Northstar V8 engine good for 320 horsepower. If only that were enough to outrun its shame. If, for some reason, you feel like taking this thing home, Harry Kaufmann Motorcars of Milwaukee says it can be yours for a paltry $74,998. We wish were joking. Check it out here.

Why Cadillac is willing to lose 43 percent of its dealers

Cadillac is offering about 400 dealers in the United States a lump sum of money to close down. That represents over 40 percent of Cadillac dealers in America. Offers start at $100,000 and top out at $180,000. The average offering is around $120,000. According to Automotive News, Cadillac chief Johan De Nysschen estimates it will cost the automaker around $50 million to close these dealers. Any dealer that chooses to remain open will have to submit to Cadillac's ambitious Project Pinnacle, which will divide dealers into incentive categories based on how many units they sell. "Every single Cadillac dealer will have the potential to earn significantly higher profits than they do today," says De Nysschen. Dealers have until November 21 to decide if they want to take the cash or submit to Project Pinnacle. A logical question: Why is Cadillac willing to spend $50 million to close down 43 percent of its dealers? First, GM's luxury brand has way more dealerships than it needs. Second, the 400 dealers with offers to shutter each sold 50 or fewer vehicles in 2015, representing just 9 percent of its sales volume in America. So, while closing these smaller dealerships may have a small initial impact on sales, it's not going to be a major hit to Cadillac. Related Video: News Source: Automotive News - sub. req.Image Credit: Gary Cameron / Reuters Cadillac Car Dealers Luxury Performance

Junkyard Gem: 1983 Cadillac Cimarron

Ah, the Cadillac Cimarron. Conceived during a time when oil prices were zooming upward and smallish luxury imports such as the Datsun 810 and BMW 320i were stealing Detroit's customers, the idea of a fuel-efficient compact Cadillac made sense. Unfortunately for GM, the Cimarron was an image-tarnishing disaster. Here's a fairly well-preserved '83 that I spotted in a Phoenix self-service wrecking yard. In the words of Pulitzer-winning Dan Neil in his 50 Worst Cars of All Time: "Everything that was wrong, venal, lazy and mendacious about GM in the 1980s was crystallized in this flagrant insult to the good name and fine customers of Cadillac." The Cimarron was a Chevrolet Cavalier with a bit of added bling and a fatter price tag. The Chevrolet Nova-based Cadillac Seville had sold pretty well during the late 1970s, so there was precedent for a small, Chevy-based Cadillac. The hood latch mechanism was broken (of course), so I couldn't shoot any photos of this car's 2.0-liter pushrod four-cylinder engine, rated at 86 horsepower. Here's a GM-produced documentary touting the futuristic design of the '83 Cimarron. The Cimarron Dream. Featured Gallery Junked 1983 Cadillac Cimarron View 12 Photos Auto News Cadillac Economy Cars Classics Sedan