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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part one

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice with a profanity-laden stream-of-consciousness writing style. Parker lives in Hawaii and spends far more time spearfishing than behind the wheel of a car. Jump ahead to Part Two here, and Part Three here. Big Money and billionaire hobbyists and rockets on wheels. Jets belching French color smoke overhead. Balance of power fuckery. Plenty of water on the ground this morning. Absurdly expensive motorcars lined up in the pissing rain. Fast twitch lunatics behind the wheel. Chomping at the bit. Let's go let's go let's go! Race hasn't even started, Ford #67 maybe dealing with clutch issues. Karma? That beautiful bastard Brad Pitt's out on the track, waving the tricolor flag. It's a standing start in "Noah's Ark" weather and the 2016 24 hours of Le Mans is go! First lap takes place behind the safety car, finished in a record setting 8 minutes 27 seconds. Wrong kind of record maybe, but this is the first time I've set my mind to watching the whole damn race. Feel like I'm part of history. 3:00 AM on Kauai, a little too early for life. Sucking down coffee like a maniac. Don't fall back asleep. Got my hands on four hours of rest, how much more can I need? Better be enough for the next twenty four hours. Gonna get kinda punchy toward the end. Jason Statham on the scene. Four feet of solid muscle, non-existent hairline. Lovely wife peanut gallery sitting next to me calls him the "best race car drive in the world." Not sure if she's serious. Toss up, could go either way. Statham's a funny guy. Heir to the Bruce Willis comedy action crown. Really good in the movie where the fat comedy lady plays a spy. Ford's on the road. Problems with gearbox pressure, apparently. Nearing a half hour in and the safety car is still on the track. Hellish amounts of water on the ground, in the air. Visibility is garbage. Getting better. Twitter wags, "Not with a bang but a whimper." Just building suspense. Mother Nature felt like killing some people today, race officials need to dial back the drivers until it dries a tad. Normal inclination would've seen 'em flying, guaranteed early lap wrecks. Sad news for that bloodthirsty part of my lizard brain I try and keep suppressed. Good news for humanity. #12 in the pit for a bit.

Audi to use this telepresence robot to fix cars

Next time you take your Audi in for service, watch to see if a little white stand is following your mechanic around. It's not some new measurement tool for your car; it's a actually a robot being controlled remotely to improve vehicle service. While bots playing a role in building cars is nothing new, the company is taking things a step further in the US by introducing Audi Robotic Telepresence to assist dealer technicians in repairing the brand's vehicles. The droids are already being used in a pilot program at about 18 dealers nationwide with plans to have it at 100 in the near future.
At the moment, ART, as its called, is more R2-D2 than The Terminator. It certainly won't be doing any wrenching on your A4 anytime soon because it doesn't even have arms. Instead, the robot comprises a remote-controlled stand with multiple cameras, a microphone and speakers. The bot is operated remotely by Audi Technical Assistance consultants and Technical Field Managers who can talk back-and-forth with mechanics about vehicle service and help to remotely diagnose problems. The droid is even equipped with a handheld camera and borescope to reach into tiny crevices.
Audi claims that ART is the first system of its kind to directly link automakers with technicians at the dealer level in this way and leads to faster, more accurate service for customers. Scroll down to watch a video of the bot in action and read the release for the current list of participating dealers.

2015 Audi S8

You've gotta hand it to the Audi A8. Last year, Mercedes-Benz launched the truly stunning S-Class, putting the rest of the high-dollar luxury flagship class on notice. With the brand-new S-Class turning heads and garnering all sorts of praise from the automotive press, classmates like the BMW 7 Series, Jaguar XJ and Audi A8 started to look, well, old. But Audi didn't see fit to just let its big sedan carry on and let the Mercedes take the cake.
So when Audi refreshed its A8 line for the 2015 model year with only minor updates, I kind of shrugged it off as just a quick way to keep the big sedan fresh until an all-new, hopefully S-Class-trumping version arrives. But then I drove the S8 pictured above, and I'm no longer so sure the Merc's shadow is as big and imposing as it once was.
Spoiler alert: the Audi S8 is simply fantastic.