2014 Volkswagen Jetta on 2040-cars

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Even 'basic' girls are tired of their cheating VW Jettas

Well, this didn't take long. Former Volkswagen CEO Martin Winterkorn's office probably hasn't even been packed yet, and the jokes about his scandal-ridden former employer have already begun to fly. Today, we'll be featuring the team from Funny Or Die, which has opted to not only skewer Volkswagen for its TDIsaster, but one of the victims of the company's catastrophe – the 'basic' girl. For those not in the know, "basic," according to Urban Dictionary is an adjective reserved for someone "devoid of defining characteristics that might make a person interesting, extraordinary, or just simply worth devoting time or attention to," and that they are "lacking intelligence and unable to socialize on even an elementary level." And when it comes to basic girls, the Volkswagen Jetta is as ubiquitous as a Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte. But with the VW controversy, basic girls are finding their Jettas aren't so good for their green credentials. So check out Funny Or Die's take on these scorned drivers, in the video above. And fair warning, there's a bit of foul language.

Former chairman Piech opposing his nieces' VW board nominations

Someone needs to option the rights to the Ferdinand Piech story for an HBO series, because it perfectly mixes the corporate intrigue of Mad Men with the family drama of The Sopranos. Plus there are some cool cars. In the latest episode, Piech isn't happy with Volkswagen's appointment of two of his nieces – Julia Kuhn-Piech and Dr. Louise Kiesling – to replace he and his wife on the automaker's supervisory board. The recently ousted chairman could try to stop them. According to German publication Bild, Piech thinks his two relatives lack the necessary automotive experience to serve on the board. Therefore, he suggests one-time Ford Premier Automotive Group boss Wolfgang Reitzle and former Siemens manager Brigitte Ederer to take the seats. However, a VW spokesperson told Automotive News Europe that there were no objections to the women's appointment, except for this story from Germany. Piech's nieces are already officially appointed to the VW supervisory board, and it's approved by the Braunschweig Local Court in Germany. His only real option to challenge them would be to file a lawsuit, according to Automotive News Europe. While the new appointees don't have their uncle's decades of history in the auto industry, they do have business experience. Dr. Kiesling has a degree in vehicle design from the Royal College of Art in London and is the managing director of an Austrian textile maker. Kuhn-Piech works in real estate sits on the supervisory board of German truck maker Man.

Audi CEO's Dieselgate arrest threatens fragile truce among VW stakeholders

FRANKFURT — The arrest and detention of Audi's chief executive forces Volkswagen Group's competing stakeholders to renegotiate the delicate balance of power that has helped keep Audi CEO Rupert Stadler in office. Volkswagen's directors are discussing how to run Audi, its most profitable division, following the arrest of the brand's long-time boss on Monday as part of Germany's investigations into the carmaker's emissions cheating scandal. The supervisory board of Audi, meanwhile, has suspended Stadler and appointed Dutchman Bram Schot as an interim replacement, a source familiar with the matter said on Tuesday. Schot joined the Volkswagen Group in 2011 after having worked as president and CEO of Mercedes-Benz Italia. He has been Audi's board member for sales and marketing since last September. The discussions risk reigniting tensions among VW's controlling Piech and Porsche families, its powerful labor representatives and its home region of Lower Saxony. VW has insisted the development of illegal software, also known as "defeat devices," installed in millions of cars was the work of low-level employees, and that no management board members were involved. U.S. prosecutors have challenged this by indicting VW's former chief executive Martin Winterkorn. Stadler's arrest raises further questions. Audi and VW said on Monday that Stadler was presumed innocent unless proved otherwise. Munich prosecutors detained Stadler to prevent him from obstructing a probe into Audi's emissions cheating, they said on Monday. Stadler is being investigated for suspected fraud and false advertising. Here are the main factors deciding the fate of Audi. Background: Audi's role in Dieselgate Volkswagen Group was plunged into crisis in 2015 after U.S. regulators found Europe's biggest carmaker had equipped cars with software to cheat emissions tests on diesel engines. The technique of using software to detect a pollution test procedure, and to increase the effectiveness of emissions filters to mask pollution levels only during tests, was first developed at Audi. "In designing the defeat device, VW engineers borrowed the original concept of the dual-mode, emissions cycle-beating software from Audi," VW said in its plea agreement with U.S. authorities in January 2017, in which the company agreed to pay a $4.3 billion fine to reach a settlement with U.S. regulators.