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Mark Webber treats Maria Sharapova to a Porsche 918 Spyder joyride

We don't much like Mark Webber right now. Part of being a racing driver is dealing with promotional stuff. It's not hard to find a driver that can't stand all this nonsense, whether it be promoting a product, meeting investors or attending some obscure event. Even a driver of Webber's caliber - a former Formula One driver for Red Bull Racing and a member of Porsche's factory Le Mans team - has to serve his time at the promo events.
Somehow, though, we don't think the Aussie driver minds this particular promo detail. In the video below, Webber attends the Porsche Tennis Grand Prix in Stuttgart. He then takes tennis superstar Maria Sharapova out for a spin behind the wheel of the Porsche 918 Spyder. The level of jealousy at the Autoblog office is palpable.
Take a look below for the video. And as we're super jealous of Mr. Webber, hop into Comments and caption the above photo based on what you think he's saying to Maria. Bonus points if you can work "vegemite" into the caption.

2015 Porsche Boxster GTS [w/video]

You know the sound: the startling pop-brraaap-pop-pop shotgun fire of unspent flammables coursing through exhaust pipes that usually signals a raw, naughty powerplant beneath the hood.
But when you're nestled in the Porsche Boxster GTS' snug seats, it's not a crackling small block V8 or a high-strung Italian flat crank making the devilish racket, but rather the new king of the Boxster/Cayman lineup, a 3.4-liter flat-six that produces 330 horsepower and 273 pound-feet of torque.
Within the emotional vacuum of a spec sheet, the Boxster GTS' pumped-up grunt seems pretty mild, with a gain of only 15 hp and 7 lb-ft, respectively. But the reworked acoustical experience goes a long way towards suggesting the GTS has a trace of racing blood in its veins, and might even be missing its catalytic converters. In addition to the sonorous, centrally positioned tailpipes, the cabin also fills with lovely mechanical strains thanks to the "Sound Symposer" acoustical amplifier that's trickled down into the Boxster/Cayman lineup from the 911 for the first time. Boxster S, we hardly knew ya.

Porsche 918 Spyder to birth stretched 2+2 version?

Porsche is known for its ability to spin off a litter of variants from a single model, and according to a report in Automobile the 918 Spyder (pictured here) might not be spared the house trick. Having taken too many brains and too much money for too much time, company chiefs are said to be examining ways to get more for their development euro out of the supercar, and Plan A is apparently otherwise known as Plan 984. That would be a four-seater, rear-wheel drive supercar that uses a stretched mold of the 918's carbon fiber tub, keeping the V8 in the same mid-mounted place and costing around 350,000 euro.
That would be less than half the MSRP of its inspiration, but the details don't sketch out a car that's just half as good. Automobile speculates it would get something like 700 horsepower in order to best the coming 911 GT2, and about 440 pound-feet of torque. The 984 is quite a ways short of being confirmed; even though a full-size study is said to exist, it's like the 918 would need to become a bigger sales hit for the 984 to happen.
The 984's fortunes don't change those of the 960, the supercoupe Porsche is building to challenge Ferrari. Its potential specs haven't changed since the last report in January, power coming from a 5.0-liter, twin-turbo, eight-cylinder boxer engine with something like 650 hp pushing a curb weight of roughly 3,100 pounds. The means a suspected 0-to-60 mile-per-hour time of 2.5 seconds.