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This junkyard '91 Grand Am is as hooptie as it gets

I spend a lot of time in junkyards. A lot of time. With all this experience, I have learned to recognize a perfect hooptie when I see one, a car whose final owner got every last bit of use out of it when its value was hovering right about at scrap value. This 1991 Pontiac Grand Am that I spotted in a San Francisco Bay Area self-service wrecking yard a few days ago, from the final model year for the third-generation Grand Am, checks all the hooptie boxes just right. First of all, it's a low-option coupe with the wretched and unloved GM Iron Duke engine, a rattly, gnashy, thrashy 2.5-liter four-cylinder kludged together using off-the-shelf parts from the Pontiac 301-cubic-inch V8 during the darkest years of the Malaise Era and used in cars whose buyers just didn't care. Most of the paint has been burned off by 25 years of harsh California sun, but the car spent sufficient time in a damp, shady spot for lichens to build up here and there. There are skeletons-with-sombreros stencils sprayed here and there, plus a big moonshine-guzzling skeleton mural painted on the hood. Goodbye, property values! Still, someone felt some affection for this car, giving it the name "Good Ol' Snakey" and painting that name on the decklid. We can assume that the Iron Duke was a bit loose by this time, probably leaving a serpentine trail of blue smoke behind the car at all times. So, the combination of cheapness, ugliness, menace, and who-gives-a-damn functionality make this Grand Am an excellent example of a pure hooptie. Within a couple of months, it will be crushed, shredded, shipped out of the Port of Oakland, and reborn in China as refrigerators and Geely Emgrands. Somewhere in Northern California, though, a few of Ol' Smokey's friends will remember this car fondly.

Check out the official 2013 Trans Am Hurst Edition commercial

The Poncho is dead. Long live the Poncho. Like certain other reoccurring personal maladies, the aftermarket community simply can't let the Trans Am go without another flare up. The guys at Trans Am Depot have worked up a quick commercial for their newest creation: The 2013 Trans Am Hurst Edition, and it watches pretty much like you'd expect it to. The footage is comprised of just about every TA male fantasy you can conceive of, from Daisy Dukes and white tank tops to tramp stamps, bikinis and ice cream cones. There simply aren't words for what you'll see below.
Of course, we like our T-Tops as much as the next guy. If you like what you see in the videos, you can pick up your very own TA by heading over to the Trans Am Depot site. The guys even have Chevrolet Camaro-based versions of the Pontiac GTO if the '77 TA treatment is too much for your tastes. Enjoy, but don't say we didn't warn you.

Junkyard Gem: 1988 Pontiac LeMans Sedan

During the 1960s, the Pontiac LeMans was a sporty, rear-wheel-drive midsize car, the GTO's cheaper sibling. Through the 1970s and into the middle 1980s, the LeMans became a bit less youthful-looking but remained a traditional rear-wheel-drive Detroit machine with a V8 engine option. Then, starting in the 1988 model year, the LeMans name went onto a South Korean-built version of the misery-inducing, front-wheel-drive Opel Kadett E. These were dark days for the Pontiac marque; here's the proof, photographed at a San Francisco Bay Area self-service wrecking yard last month. This one didn't quite make it to the 100,000-mile mark. These cars were very, very cheap and sold reasonably well, but nearly all of the 1988-1993 LeManses are hatchbacks. I have seen a total of two Daewoo LeMans sedans during the last decade, and this is one of them. Under the hood, 74 raging Opel/Daewoo horsepower. This content is hosted by a third party. To view it, please update your privacy preferences. Manage Settings. In this car's homeland, it benefited from extremely macho South Korean voiceovers in its television advertising. This content is hosted by a third party. To view it, please update your privacy preferences. Manage Settings. In the United States, the ads for the LeMans were all about the hatchback, and all about cheap excitement. Related Video: Featured Gallery Junked 1988 Pontiac LeMans Sedan View 12 Photos Auto News Pontiac