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Five reasons to love, or hate, the culture of German cars

A few months back, we took a 500-foot view of the culture of American cars, dissecting prides and prejudices on our way to the conclusion that automotive allegiances can be simultaneously embraced and derided. We had so much fun with the narrative that we decided to do it again, this time taking a look at Germany and its world-renowned lineup of automakers, including the likes of Audi, BMW, Mercedes-Benz, Porsche and Volkswagen, among others. Join us below as we discuss the points and counterpoints that make or have made the German auto industry what it is today. And remember, Germany did pretty much invent the automobile, after all... The V12 Engine If America is known for the proliferation of the V8 engine, an argument could be made that Germany owns the V12. Yes, of course, other companies have created V12 engines – Ferrari, Jaguar and Lamborghini immediately come to mind – but the big 12-cylinder powerplants from BMW and Mercedes-Benz, in particular, have proven to be some of the most effortless, luxurious and downright over-built engines the world has ever seen. These days, having 12 cylinders is more a case of wretched excess than ever before, and yet, you can still stroll into your local BMW or Mercedes dealership and get a brand-new 760i, S600 or even an over-the-top G65 AMG, efficiency be damned. Best of all, since the majority of these German powerhouses depreciate as fast as an anchor sinks, nearly any auto enthusiast who dreams of a dozen cylinders can satisfy their carnal desires. Current Star: 2016 Mercedes-Maybach S600 View 28 Photos Diesel Engines Remember how we talked about those glorious V12 engines? Well, you can even get one from Audi that runs on diesel. If your compression-ignition fantasies err more on the side of fuel savings, that's no problem, either. Audi, BMW, Mercedes and Volkswagen have got you covered, with engines starting as small as 800 cubic centimeters (Smart Fortwo). If you want something a little more practical, it's hard to argue with a VW Golf TDI, which will provide plenty of space for you and three of your best friends, plus a fair bit of luggage, all while returning 50-ish miles per gallon. For the purposes of this discussion, we'd rather focus on the asinine levels of torque provided by Germany's high-end diesel engines than the lower-end fuel sippers.

2016 Mercedes-Benz Metris First Drive

We're sitting 8,700 feet above sea level in the idyllic old mining town of Dunton Hot Springs, nestled deep in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. We've come to drive the newest and cheapest Mercedes-Benz, a midsize work van called the Metris. As the day begins, Mercedes van boss Bernhard Glaser states the obvious, "We're setting up camp in the US." It's a good line, perhaps a little too fitting given our surroundings, but it's accurate. Though the US commercial van market is dominated by Ford and General Motors, Mercedes has staked out a competitive position and is digging for more. The tall, capable Sprinter relaunched with a Mercedes badge in the United States in 2010 and has grown into a $1-billion enterprise in America. Now comes Phase 2, dubbed "Mission Metris," starring a tweener van that's smaller than the towering Sprinter yet larger the Ford Transit Connect and Nissan NV200. The 2016 Metris enters a crowded and evolving segment that also includes the Ram ProMaster City and GM's super-old Chevy Express and GMC Savana. Mercedes will sell the Metris in cargo and passenger forms, meaning it will be outfitted for a range of roles, including taxi and limousine companies, delivery duties, service, and maintenance. Yes, your cable guy might show up in a Mercedes. That's part of the plan, actually. Though the Metris was engineered to be a pack-mule of a van, if the shine of the star on its grille helps attract new buyers – like a chain of upscale hotels that needs a fleet of shuttles – all the better. Our short test drive begins outside the small canyon town of Dolores, CO, as we haul four people and some luggage to the airport in a pre-production Metris. Normally test programs staged by automakers are a little contrived – many feature an off-road course or track time for even the most mundane vehicles – but our stint behind the wheel of the Metris is almost exactly how the van could be used in real life. We make our way along Colorado's winding highways, cruising around 60 miles per hour for much of it. The Metris offers an excellent view of the road and the snow-capped mountains that rise in the distance. It's an easy van to drive. We don't feel like we're piloting a U-Haul or something else cumbersome. Mercedes is billing this as the 'right-sized' option, and our initial impressions support that sentiment as we navigate the curves flanked by steep drop-offs.

Mystery shoppers love Infiniti, hate Tesla

Infiniti, followed by Lexus tied with Mercedes-Benz took the top two spots for best sales experience according to mystery shoppers from the latest Pied Piper Prospect Satisfaction Index, while EV manufacturer Tesla recorded the lowest overall score. Not surprisingly, premium brands dominated the top ranks. Including the three already mentioned, luxury brands occupied seven of the top ten spots and included Audi, BMW, Porsche, and the only American brand to crack the upper echelon, Cadillac. Toyota, Volkswagen, and Nissan rounded out the first ten positions. The news for domestic automakers isn't good. Aside from Caddy, the only other star-spangled automaker to score above the industry average is Chrysler. The rest of FCA, most of GM, and all of Ford fell below the line. But Pied Piper's mystery shoppers handed Tesla the biggest walloping – the company is ten full points below the next lowest brand, Volvo, and its score of 86 is 17 below the average of 103. It's baffling, considering the company's touted direct-sales model. "Tesla leaves me scratching my head," Fred O'Hagan, Pied Piper's president and CEO, told Wards Auto. "They own all of their stores, so you would think each one would be doing the same thing. But they're not. Tesla is consistent in its inconsistencies." O'Hagan added that there's a "huge variation" in Tesla's store-to-store effectiveness, and that in some cases, shoppers found showroom workers that acted more like "museum curators," Wards Auto reports. It might be popular to call Tesla the Apple of the car world, but based on Pied Piper's work, the brand has a long way to go to emulate the uniform shopping experience of an Apple Store. The news might be bad for Tesla, but even for the brands that scored below average, there's cause for celebration. Only Tesla and Mini lost points in this year's rankings, and only Mercedes and Lincoln held steady. Every other brand, including Infiniti, which topped the index for the first time, gained at least one point. The biggest improvements belong to Porsche, Land Rover, and Mitsubishi, which all jumped five points. Pied Piper's annual Prospect Satisfaction Index uses mystery shoppers – over 6,100 this year – from across the country to assess dealers and generate rankings from over 50 individual factors. News Source: Pied Piper via WardsAuto Green Audi BMW Cadillac Chrysler Infiniti Lexus Mercedes-Benz Nissan Tesla Toyota Car Buying Car Dealers study