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Stolen Lincoln Town Car stars in wacky GTA-like airborne crash

  If we can believe our eyes, a carload of people is lucky to be alive. What we know is what's on the videos stitched together above — in the first POV, a white Lincoln Town Car busts through a barrier at the end of Cumberland Street in San Francisco, a dead end road. Looks ridiculous, not crazy. The crazy part comes in the second POV, taken from a Nest camera across Sanchez Street. The Town Car was going fast enough to jump-launch itself over the concrete berm at the base of the barrier, nosedive into the hill below, flip over end-over-end into a tree below that, then slide down the tree to land on its roof at the base of a set of steps going down to Sanchez Street below Cumberland.  The kind bit is when a Good Samaritan runs to the Town Car and opens the front passenger door. The wacky bit is when four people slowly emerge from the town car while engaging in quite a bit of oddball banter — one woman who was in the back seat says "I'm sorry" and "I love you" to someone named Kevin numerous times — then walk away. The silent couple runs up the steps, Kevin and his apologetic, loving associate sashay down Sanchez Street. A report from local channel KTVU (full report below) via Carscoops, says, "Witnesses told KTVU the incident started with a carjacking." Compiling comments on the second YouTube vid alleges the car's occupants carjacked a DoorDash driver — a situation that's far more common that we'd have guessed before looking into this story — and that the man who opened the door "noted several bottles of open liquor, two Tasers, and the police reported a gun was found in the car." If the second bit is true, that and copious amounts of adrenaline would explain why the crew was eager and able to skedaddle. The occupants haven't been found; of course police are looking for them. KTVU writes, "Anyone with information about the incident is asked to contact the San Francisco Police Department at 415-575-4444 or text a tip to TIP411 and begin the message with SFPD."

Junkyard Gem: 1978 Lincoln Continental Town Car

Just before Ford downsized the Continental for 1980 and made the Town Car a separate model for 1981, the biggest and plushest new sedan in the Dearborn universe was the mighty Continental Town Car. Here's one from 1978, the second-to-last model year of the two-and-a-half-ton Continental Town Car, found in nice condition in a Denver car graveyard last month. This car rolled out of the Lincoln showroom loaded, with the landau-style "Coach Roof" and just about every additional option. Base price on the 1978 Continental with the Town Car package started at $11,606 (about $48,350 in 2020 dollars), but this car cost much more than that. A new Mercedes-Benz S-Class cost better than twice as much that year (and it was worth it), but you still had to be a heavy-duty high-roller to buy a new '78 Town Car. The base engine in the 1978 Continental was a 400-cubic-inch (6.6-liter) V8 making a grim 166 horsepower, a truly horrific ratio of 25.2 horsepower per liter of displacement (torque came to a respectable 319 lb-ft, though). If the new Navigator got 25.2 horses for each liter in its turbo V6, it would have a mere 88 horsepower to haul its nearly three tons, rather than the 450 horses that 21st-century engine technology gives us. The good news with this car is that it came with the optional 460-cubic-inch (7.5-liter) V8, rated at 210 horsepower and 357 lb-ft. That was sufficient to get this car's 4,660 pounds moving well enough. Still just 28 horses per liter, but a significant upgrade. These cars weren't about performance, however. They were about a silent, cushy ride and poofy seats that swallowed you in velour comfort. When did Detroit stop making these pillow-top seats? And opera lights? And snazzy "coffin-handle" door pulls? Yes, even the wire wheels (a $333 option, or $1,385 today) stayed on this car to the very end. Why get a Rolls-Royce when you could have this, the grille of this behemoth seems to ask us. Though it remained in good condition when it arrived in its final parking space, a Malaise Era Continental sedan just isn't worth much in the enthusiast world. Even a 1978 Mark V in nice shape would be hard-pressed to find a forever home nowadays. At least it had a chance to visit the Norman Rockwell Museum in Massachusetts before the end. In what came to look like a very smart move by Ford, in light of certain geopolitical events in 1979, the Panther-based 1980 Continentals weighed nearly a half-ton less than this car.

Junkyard Gem: 1979 Lincoln Continental Mark V Bill Blass Edition

The car news in 1979 America wasn't all bad, despite gas rationing and Detroit V8s producing 25 horsepower per liter of displacement. That's because some of the plushest, flashiest, white-powder-ready luxury coupes in history were rolling off assembly lines at the time. Ford's game was strong when it came to such machinery; there were long-snouted Thunderbird Town Landaus, opulent Cougar XR-7s and — best of all — the special-edition Lincoln Continental Mark Vs. The Lincoln Division had partnered with four prestigious fashion houses to lift the Mark V to unheard-of levels of conspicuous snazz, and I found one of those cars in a Denver car graveyard. The design houses that worked their magic on these Mark Vs were Givenchy, Pucci, Cartier and Bill Blass. Each had a distinctive color scheme and mob-boss-grade interior. The Pucci cars were the rarest, with only 763 built during the 1977-1979 model years whereas 6,720 Bill Blass Mark Vs were built during that period. Today's Junkyard Gem is the second 1979 Bill Blass Mark V I've found in this very junkyard; the previous find happened back in 2015. Bill Blass was an Indiana native who began his design career as a member of the 603rd Camouflage Battalion of the United States Army during World War II, helping to deceive the Germans with a fake "Ghost Army" poised to hit the beaches far from the actual D-Day sites. Blass worked with Ford from 1975 through 1992, when the last Bill Blass Mark VIIs were built (Cartier stuck it out much longer). The 1979 Bill Blass Mark V came with "Tu-Tone Midnight Blue Metallic" and white exterior paint, while the interior was done up in white or blue leather with contrasting straps and buttons bearing the Blass logo. This one is pretty icky after 44 years, but hints of its former glory can be seen. A white padded-vinyl "carriage roof" was standard equipment on the Bill Blass Mark V. It was a $1,200 option (about $5,286 in 2023 dollars) on ordinary Mark Vs. The one on this car trapped water against the sheet metal and caused it to rust out. All 1979 Mark Vs got the Cartier clock, with calendar function. A 400-cubic-inch (6.6-liter) V8 was mandatory on all 1979 Continental models. This one made 159 horsepower and 315 pound-feet, which was grim for a coupe that scaled in at nearly 4,600 pounds. The MSRP for the '79 Bill Blass Mark V was $16,546, or about $72,880 in today's money. The Collector's Series Mark V cost even more that year: $22,029 ($97,031 after inflation).