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24 Hours of Le Mans live update part one

We tasked surfing journalist Rory Parker to watch this year's live stream of the 2016 24 Hours of Le Mans. What follows is an experiment to experience the world's greatest endurance race from the perspective of a motorsports novice with a profanity-laden stream-of-consciousness writing style. Parker lives in Hawaii and spends far more time spearfishing than behind the wheel of a car. Jump ahead to Part Two here, and Part Three here. Big Money and billionaire hobbyists and rockets on wheels. Jets belching French color smoke overhead. Balance of power fuckery. Plenty of water on the ground this morning. Absurdly expensive motorcars lined up in the pissing rain. Fast twitch lunatics behind the wheel. Chomping at the bit. Let's go let's go let's go! Race hasn't even started, Ford #67 maybe dealing with clutch issues. Karma? That beautiful bastard Brad Pitt's out on the track, waving the tricolor flag. It's a standing start in "Noah's Ark" weather and the 2016 24 hours of Le Mans is go! First lap takes place behind the safety car, finished in a record setting 8 minutes 27 seconds. Wrong kind of record maybe, but this is the first time I've set my mind to watching the whole damn race. Feel like I'm part of history. 3:00 AM on Kauai, a little too early for life. Sucking down coffee like a maniac. Don't fall back asleep. Got my hands on four hours of rest, how much more can I need? Better be enough for the next twenty four hours. Gonna get kinda punchy toward the end. Jason Statham on the scene. Four feet of solid muscle, non-existent hairline. Lovely wife peanut gallery sitting next to me calls him the "best race car drive in the world." Not sure if she's serious. Toss up, could go either way. Statham's a funny guy. Heir to the Bruce Willis comedy action crown. Really good in the movie where the fat comedy lady plays a spy. Ford's on the road. Problems with gearbox pressure, apparently. Nearing a half hour in and the safety car is still on the track. Hellish amounts of water on the ground, in the air. Visibility is garbage. Getting better. Twitter wags, "Not with a bang but a whimper." Just building suspense. Mother Nature felt like killing some people today, race officials need to dial back the drivers until it dries a tad. Normal inclination would've seen 'em flying, guaranteed early lap wrecks. Sad news for that bloodthirsty part of my lizard brain I try and keep suppressed. Good news for humanity. #12 in the pit for a bit.

Ford F-450 claims best-in-class towing, company abandons practice of removing items to boost payload number

The ongoing heavy-duty truck battle between Ford and Ram is showing no signs of slowing down. The Blue Oval is trying to remove at least one point of contention between the two brands by testing its 2015 F-450 Super Duty using the Society of Automotive Engineers J2807 towing standard, which Ram also uses. In the new evaluation, the F-450 is rated at a max towing capacity of 31,200 pounds. That's an identical amount as under Ford's own, previous test.
"We leave no doubt with customers that the F-450 pickup truck has best-in-class towing of 31,200 pounds - whether tested using our own internal towing standards or SAE J2807," said Raj Nair, Ford group vice president for Global Product Development, in the company's release.
At the same time, Ford is also changing how it calculates the F-450's payload. Instead of using its minimum curb weight as before, the brand is now using the truck's base curb weight. The revision lowers the pickup's rating to 5,300 pounds, compared to 5,450 pounds previously. The company said in its announcement that the reason for this is "aligning its payload rating practices with other manufacturers to make it easier for customers to compare vehicles." General Motors made a similar switch for its pickups in August.

Even Ford executives had issues with MyFord Touch

MyFord Touch is one of the auto industry's more controversial features. The media broadly panned the infotainment system developed with Microsoft for its slow responses and reliance on voice commands to navigate its deep menus. Oh, and Ford executives weren't big fans, either. Newly revealed court documents in a California class-action lawsuit demonstrate the level of venom Ford employees, both big and small, reserved for the Blue Oval's infotainment system. An error caused Bill Ford's navigation system to crash, leaving the family scion stuck on the side of the road in an unfamiliar area. The documents, unearthed by Forbes, detail current CEO Mark Fields' aggravations with MFT, too. A mechanic emailed an image of a cracked infotainment screen on an Edge to one of Ford's top Sync engineers, Kenneth Williams, suggesting "Mark Fields may have been a little aggravated with the system." But Ford and Fields' issues are nothing compared to the woes of the engineers that had to work on MFT. In a collection of emails obtained by Forbes, one engineer called the system "a polished turd," while another simply said, "These poor customers." And after one engineer suggested using a photo of Ford's Oakville Assembly Plant – home of the Edge, Flex, Lincoln MKX, and MKT production – as a background for the system, one of his coworkers said in an email that someone should instead Photoshop the image to read "abandon hope all ye who enter here," the Detroit News reports. Another summed up the problem, saying: "Ford's quality reputation is completely on the line ... another model year with the same crap is not acceptable." MyFord Touch almost single-handedly torpedoed Ford's reputation in widely reported quality metrics, including JD Power and Consumer Reports. Ford responded with a refreshed Sync3, a wildly improved rethink of its infotainment system that is far more responsive and easier to live with every day. Related Video: News Source: Forbes, The Detroit NewsImage Credit: Ford Government/Legal Ford Lincoln Technology Mark Fields sync 3