1993 Cadillac Fleetwood Sedan 4-door 5.7l, Runs Great on 2040-cars

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2015 Cadillac Escalade

I have never liked traveling to Monterey, CA. The picturesque coastal city is about 300 miles from my home in Los Angeles, which means cramped and uncomfortable regional aircraft are part of the equation when the turnaround is only one night. Over the years, I have cursed the LA Basin's bumper-to-bumper traffic en route to the airport, argued with TSA personnel over carry-on baggage and waited countless hours for the fog to lift just for the anguish of being packed into a small regional jet for the flight. Of course, the process repeats on the trip home with equal misery.
Yet this time I am not suffering.
Cadillac has dropped its all-new 2015 Escalade in my driveway. Instead of battling city congestion, attempting to reason with misinformed government agents, snacking on a too-small bag of pretzels and physically rubbing shoulders with a dubious stranger for 90-plus minutes within the confines of a bumpy aircraft, I have chosen to forgo air travel and drive myself door-to-door in a fullsize luxury sport utility vehicle.

GM recalls 2014 Cadillac CTS recall

No, that headline isn't a typo - General Motors has reportedly issued a recall for one of its own recalls. The recall of a recall affects the recall of the 2014 Cadillac CTS, which wasn't supposed to be recalled. Except that the 2014 CTS was supposed to be recalled. Oh no, now we've gone cross-eyed.
Allow us to explain. The redesigned, third-generation CTS Sedan does not feature a faulty ignition switch, while the 2014 CTS Coupe and Wagon, which are based on the second-gen car, do. And as it turns out, there are only 264 of those vehicles included in last week's 8.2-million-unit, ignition-switch recall. Model year 2003 to 2013 CTS Sedans, Coupes and Wagons are still covered.
It's not entirely clear how this, frankly, colossal mistake was made, although we're betting GM is rapidly trying to get to the bottom of this embarrassing issue. Regardless, let's just take what solace we can in there being one less vehicle that GM has recalled this year.

Watch Brad Pitt's Chinese Cadillac XTS commercial

Once upon a time, in a land not so far from this one, Brad Pitt was the very face anti-consumerism. You see, when he slipped into the role of the elitist-loathing, food-abusing, violence-embracing Tyler Durden from Fight Club, his visage was inextricably married to images of leveling credit card corporations with nothing more than a little human fat and some determination. Of course, that was before Pitt settled into old age with a passel of children at his feet. Now, it seems, he'll shill for something as long as it doesn't damage his reputation in America.
Need proof? Look no further than this Chinese ad for the Cadillac XTS. In it, Pitt contentedly wafts the big front-wheel drive barge around San Francisco against a mildly euphoric soundtrack. You can check out the scene for yourself below, just make sure you have your last meal squarely situated in your stomach before pressing play. We have to wonder if Pitt wakes up in the middle of the night with Chuck Palahniuk's oddly omniscient words echoing in his ears: "Then you're trapped in your lovely nest, and the things you used to own, now they own you."